I just came back home late today( I am not saying late to justify my excuse of coming home late but to say that it wasn’t really that bad in comparison to its consequences).

The first thing that came my way was a tight one across my face before I could even realise how late I was.

The second thing that came my way was a series of dialogues to tell me that I should be really guilt conscious of the crime I had committed.

“We’ll die one day waiting for you” - well even I know I am late and I am sorry for it but why do you make it so melodramatic ?
“You are so careless and irresponsible . You don’t care about us.” – I really don’t know what to say to this . Sigh !
“No one can do as much as we have done for you. We are not wrong” I know I should be grateful to you, for all you have given me but why degrade the feeling by saying it.
“Your friends are more important to you than us. You don’t talk to us” -please ask yourselves why is that ? Probably it is because you never tried to be a good friend or rather never understood what I used to feel as a child.

I woke up this morning and the first thing that came to my mind was that oooh no- the same day once again !

Whats new in my life ?

And I’ll die one day still stuck with this routine – N O ! One life I want to live it.

Let me be on a high; let me  live today,tomorrow can wait.

My dad left his home came to Dehradun when he was 19 and started his business and since then he has been on his own. I am 24 and still struggling to find  my place.
I am not asking for any suggestions but the question remains -when you have lived your life the way you wanted to then don’t you think I deserve the same right?
Did you bring me into this world  so that I will do all those things which you wanted to do always but could not or that which you would want of me ?

All in all a simple question – DO I DESERVE TO LIVE ?
Am I a dummy carrier of your emotional needs/ desires from life.

Indeed I love my parents but it doesn’t mean they own my choices.

Nature gives us an amazing example where a baby bird leaves the nest as soon as it learns to fly.
My birth was decided by my parents,true, but that I shall be born in this family,in this place at this given time,who decides that ?

Who decides my life ? It’s the almighty who must have decided this way before my parents decided to give birth to me.

So I should be more grateful to Him more than anyone else to have given me the life I am living.
He loves me so much that He never complains of what I am or when I come home late. Neither does He tell me that I should be doing things according to Him or else He will be angry.Nor does He slap me when I say I want to live.

Love is unconditional.  “I will not talk to you because you didn’t do this” – how foolish is that ?

But my parents tell me, this is what is love according to them

“Son you will be never outdo us in making wiser decisions, no matter how old you grow. We will make a better choice for you because we know you every time better than you know yourself” – indirectly meaning “I OWN YOU COZ IAM YOUR DAD”

Related posts:

  1. Was it love? Or was it the idea of being in love? “Was it love? Or was it the idea of being...
  2. What will measure my ability? What will measure my ability ? Will marks measure my...

  • Pingback: Tweets that mention I own you coz I am your DAD | Doon Youth Centre -- Topsy.com

  • Priyanka

    In short “Back with a bang”

    totally realistic lines…
    Awesome man..you made me speechless…can’t write anythng..
    Gr8 work once again..

  • http://anshulsgarage.blogspot.com/ Anshul

    thanks a lot priyanka
    its really a sensitive issue..i hope i connect to our readers

    • http://siddatwork.com Administrator

      You are boy !

  • Ken

    AS i read the article I was struck by the AUTHORS ABILITY TO REMAIN THE GOOD RESPECTFUL SON, NOT biting back at the parents but struggling with his own sense of justice and desire to live.
    As a father I am hit by how we as men take positions that are not ours to take forgetting that we are also sons who may be passing on the garbage from one generation to the next.

    I am encouraged as a father to wait at the door to welcome my sons home, thankful that they have chosen to honour my house! They could be somewhere else tonight!

    Thank you Anshul for putting things into perspective for us fathers.

    • http://anshulsgarage.blogspot.com/ Anshul

      incidents such as these make me think on a lot of alternatives ,but then the question that comes up is..
      am I being reactive?
      or do i care about relationships?

  • Akshat

    bhaiya wen i was reading ur blog..i jus got daam engrossed.I never wanted it to end.COULD feel da reailty within dat.Very few ppl can put da feel of being minimized due to family burdens,but u did it so well.while reading ur blog i cud very well imagine da situation bhaiya…..its nt being drowned in emotions dat m tlng u dis..u kno sumthng bhaiya.UR DA BEST BROTHER…and da BEST PERSON i eva came across..You hv been an awsome motivational person filed up with confidence smartness and intellectuality…cheers to You..u kno…many ppl of dis world…dnt wana be sachin.dnt wana be christiano ronaldo…they want..dt atleat i can be 1 percent of u..and trust me bhaiya i fall n dat categoree…love u….

  • Raj

    You are rational man!

    Hope adult would understand this…for us to introspect!!

    “education is a means to achieve human goal of total well being based upon the premise that without proper education the child would not find his/her needs even when they turn adult”.

  • http://srayyangar.blogspot.com S.R.Ayyangar

    This is a ‘Ghar Ghar ki Baat’. The values and thought process have changed over a period of time and those who are not able to change with time and tide are looser.

    • http://siddatwork.com Administrator

      Changing values is a problem. Getting them wrong in the first place is a bigger problem.
      There were successful families even back them which stuck with the right choice and values.
      There are successful families now, who have stuck with the same right choices and values.
      “The same right choices and values” – Values remain the same, I think.

    • http://anshulsgarage.blogspot.com/ Anshul

      I think values are something that cannot change over a period of time..Its our perception which has undergone a change..
      I think we need to look back to assess as in what excatly has gone wrong

  • Amod Adaval

    Hello Anshul!
    I read your article the day it was on the blog and it left me speechless. Though since then I was in a dilemma as I wanted to comment as a father and as well as a son, simultaneously. I wanted to write so much on this but was not able to find words. Finally I could get one. If I step in your father’s sheo I come accross one simple word i.e. CONCERNED. They are really concerned for you but their way of showing this was probably not in the right manner (SORRY PARENTS). A bit of Love was required to show their concern. As a son I would have said ‘SORRY, I made you wait’ and not concluded their attitude with “I own you cause I am your Dad”.(Sorry Anshul)

    • http://anshulsgarage.blogspot.com/ Anshul

      I very well know they are concerned for me and that is very much justified and at this point i second your opinion that probably their way of concern is not the right one.
      Only one msg….We exist both together and individually so we need to respect each other.